first solo road trip and scared as hell....

[birdybird]

hi
this is my first post here. As my title suggests, I am contemplating my first solo road trip and I am scared!! I am 43, female and planning on driving from North Carolina out to Idaho to visit my sister. I am planning on giving myself about 7-8 days to get out there- then will fly back with my mother, who will already be there visiting.
Needless to say, my whole family thinks I am crazy and are discouraging me. My husband and daughters are dumbfounded- cannot figure out why the woman who "always plays it safe" is planning this "crazy adventure". My parents and siblings are already taking bets on my chickening out and are , as stated, very very discouraging, not supportive at all.
A variety of reasons that I won't go into on this forum have led me to contemplate this solo sojourn. Mostly being that I am tired of being afraid to travel alone, to try new things- just tired of being held back by my fears of being ALONE and HELPLESS and DEPENDENT on others. My whole life, my family has viewed me as flaky and unpredictable ( even tho there is much evidence to the contrary and I now know this....) and I am ready to shed that once and for all...
Please, honest advice is needed. Am I crazy? Is it "dangerous", "crazy", as my husband and family think? My sister actually told me tonight, when I was talking about it, that I was " immature" and "deluding myself" about my abilities to do this.....
Would love honest feedback from you all
Thanks so much!
Birdybird

[Mark Sedenquist]

I am contemplating my first solo road trip and I am scared!!

Here is an article you might find helpful as you begin to plan this adventure. Welcome to the Great American RoadTrip Forum! It is my experience, that there are considerably more women who undertake solo trips than then men.

First of all, of course you can do it. The co-editor of RTA, Megan Edwards, does 1-2 a year -- she is doing one in July where she will fly to Atlanta and then zig-zay her way to Birmingham via the Great Smokeys National Park.

In the meantime, here are some thoughts from some of the other solo woman trippers who hang here. And I would suggest you write to Moderator Judy for some tips!

Mark

[gorn256]

Driving across America is FUN! You'll love it. Don't worry, usually everybody is apprehensive to travel, for the first time, across the country alone. I was when I had to drive from Seattle to Florida. And you know what? That road trip made me a better person. And now I love driving across America! Eight months after that roadtrip, I drove solo from Key West to San Diego to Seattle. Just make sure to stop by some of the National Parks and sites of interest along the way. That way, you'll have more fun, which will hopefully reduce any stress you may feel. Remember, the biggest risk you take is not taking one, so go for it!

[Mass Tim]

My whole life, my family has viewed me as flaky and unpredictable

I don't necessarily think there is anything wrong with that! Sometimes people that haven't experienced the joy of a road trip can feel this way. Frankly, I don't understand it.

My sister actually told me tonight, when I was talking about it, that I was " immature" and "deluding myself" about my abilities to do this.....

I'm sorry to hear that; already you've shown great sense by giving yourself 7-8 days to get out there. This gives you time to get out and enjoy the scenery. If you see something interesting, you can stop and explore. That can't be done on a plane!

I must say, early on, I heard similar quotes from my family. Many short and long trips and years later, they still think I'm a bit strange for my preferred method of travel, but that's about all. There's no longer a question that if I say I'm going to go somewhere, then I will.

You will find from just a cursory glance around this forum that there are many here that take solo trips, for various reasons.

Some just to get away for a few days, others are moving to a new home, still others are "soul searching", etc. I believe that anybody with a car and a will to do so can take a solo trip and enjoy it. The road is a lot safer than the movies would have you believe.

So, take a look around the forum and the site, check out our planning page, and when you're ready to go, enjoy! We'd love to hear back about the great time you had.

[RedCorral]

There are lots of women who travel in their RVs alone so you can do it in a car. You just need to make sure your car is in good shape, get AAA or a comparable road service (also good for maps and travel guides), and don't forget your cell phone. With a little planing you can pick a fun route that takes you through some amazing places.

Do you have any special interests or places you've always wanted to visit? There are some obvious "must sees" on your likely route. Unless you don't like scenery, you can choose from Yellowstone and the Grand Tetons in Wyoming, Badlands and Black Hills (Wind Cave or Crystal Caverns and Mt. Rushmore, Custer State Park (wonderful herds of bison and pronghorn antelope that you can see up close) in South Dakota, Devil's Tower in Wyoming (did you see "Close Enounters of the Third Kind"?)

For city things there is the Gateway Arch in St. Louis (take the ride to the top), Music City (Nashville) if you like country music, there's no place in the midwest to shop like the Country Club Plaza in Kansas City. We like the art museums in both St. Louis and Kansas City.

If you like history there are a bunch such as The Hermitage (Andrew Jackson's home in Nashville), Custer Battlefield in Montana, Cahokia Mounds (biggest in the US) in Collinsville, east of St. Louis, and Laura Ingalls Wilder's "little house on the prairie" in De Smet, South Dakota.

That should get you started.

Good for you for making the decision to go for it. We're all proud of you!

[UKCraig]

I recently got back from my first solo trip outside of Europe. I was nervous at first but thought sod it and just went ahead and booked the flights. After that I couldn't change my mind else I'd be paying for the trip anyway! You know what? I loved it and I think it changed me somehow, made me stronger, I guess. Of course you'd need to keep the usual personal security issues in mind but to no greater degree than you would in your home city... just get out there and enjoy yourself!

[lhuff]

I'm going to undertake my first long distance solo road trip this summer. I've roadtripped with others, doing all the driving, etc for years. However, I'm hearing the same things you are. I'm also viewed as the flaky and unpredictable one. Hmmm - are we related, maybe. :)

After lots of soul searching I've decided to ignore the naysayers and do what I need and want to do for myself. Luckily, for me, I've done a lot of short trips by myself so I'm probably not as worried about some issues as you are. I plan on making my driving days fairly short (no 15 hours days on this trip), being obsessive about the appearance of any hotels I stay in, and taking along a wifi capable laptop so that I can communicate with people even when cell phone service is not available. I always go with the rule of thumb that even though my gut is a bit paranoid about safety issues I will follow it anyway.

Good luck on your planning and have a happy trip.

Laura

[Mark Sedenquist]

... and taking along a wifi capable laptop so that I can communicate with people even when cell phone service is not available.

Laura, all excellent advice -- but gotta make one comment, I can't imagine such a place can exist in America -- it would have Wi-Fi but not cellular coverage. The Wi-Fi transceivers are often located on cell towers -- the only place I can think of where this might be possible would be the inside of large hotel (where cell service can not penetrate and the hotel is supplying the Wi-Fi feed).

Mark

[goodolerockytop]

No need to worry about driving solo...although I'm a male, I did a trip from CA to FL years ago by myself and was just as apprehensive...but as someone who has done several cross country drives with friends, I found it just as rewarding by doing it myself. There's a sort of spiritual awakening you'll get and theres also something hard to define but quite comforting in doing it yourself. Just play it safe...Try and drive during daylight for the most part, always have plenty of gas, charge your cell-phone etc....

People won't understand until they do it themselves, but trust me you are on a very rewarding and adventure of self-awareness...Enjoy!

[RoadDog]

I like driving solo. When doing that, you can do exactly what you want and when you want. You leave when you want to. My wife is the human leave delay. It always takes an extra hour or so to get going when she is with me. Although, I like her navigating skills as I tend to get lost a lot.

However, getting lost just means you'll get to see something you wouldn't have.

Keep soloing down that Two Lane Highway. --RoadDog