The roads are jammed, the kids
are squabbling, the weather is sleety and the pumpkin
pie is going cold in the trunk. Ah, yes, it's the annual
Thanksgiving road trip. Is there anything you can do
to make this pilgrimage more bearable? Yes, there is.
"…Over the river and through
the woods to Grandmother's house we go …"
Television commercials do a marvelous job
of portraying the ideal road trip. You're in a fabulous
car, alone on a scenic highway, headed for -- who cares?
You're free and moving with the wind. Life is perfect.
Now picture this far-more-likely scenario.
You're heading out the day before Thanksgiving to get
to your aunt's house in time for turkey. This is no
car ad, even if you're driving a dream machine. If you
or your aunt live in metropolitan areas, you're going
to be seeing a lot more red taillights than magnificent
vistas. There's a very good chance this is not going
to be a speed
run.
In fact, in our experience, those interminable
traffic stoppages occur just as your 7-year-old child
and your aging cocker spaniel both announce that they
need a potty break. You realize that the weather forecasters
failed to mention a sudden 20-degree drop in temperature
that is transforming your carefully crafted 12-layer
salad into frozen compost in the trunk. An impenetrable
tule fog has just obliterated the road in front of you,
and you are beginning to doubt that you'll find an exit
in time to prevent the double accident building in the
back seat.
It can be a challenge to keep a good road
trip attitude when you've got dinner waiting and you're
traveling with the holiday hordes, but with a little
planning, it's not impossible. These seven tips should
help keep a smile on your face, even when you're stuck
between exits on a jammed super-slab full of other turkey-destined
travelers.
- Don't follow the crowd. Sometimes
the best time to travel is on the holiday itself.
Or, if you can take the time, a couple of days before
or after the holiday rush. In the case of Thanksgiving,
that means hitting the road on Tuesday and/or returning
on Monday. We rarely have that much flexibility, but
we've found that traveling on Thanksgiving Day is
actually a nice experience. The traffic jams are pretty
much gone, and even if our arrival is a little too
late for the official feast, the reward is a great
selection of tasty leftovers and hosts who have had
a chance to relax from their frenzied preparations
for the holiday.
- Get a CB
radio and learn how to use it. There is a
tendency these days to think CBs are outmoded, but
nothing could be further from the truth. Yes, professional
drivers use cell phones and satellite Internet connections,
but they still rely on CBs for local information and
safety advisories. For car drivers, no other device
can provide such instant information on road hazards,
tie-ups and alternate routes. Best of all, CBs work
even with cell phones don't.
- Keep all your electronic options
in play. If you hit one of those interminable
delays, you can always turn on your laptop, DVD player,
MP3 player or other entertainment device. If you happen
to be in an area with good wireless service, you can
even log onto the Web and get local traffic information.
Worried about depleting the batteries? Then get a
power
inverter for your electronic gizmos.
- Think like a Boy Scout. Around
the holidays, you have to be prepared for just about
anything, so keep a cache of emergency supplies in
your vehicle. Include these items: blanket, flashlight,
candle and matches, bandana or tea towel, paper towels,
first aid kit, batteries, water and a good adventure
novel. Carry emergency food, too. Canned items are
best - We carry MREs (meals ready to eat) -- but things
like Spam and fruit cocktail are fine. If the cans
don't have pull tabs, bring a can opener, and don't
forget some plastic utensils. If you keep emergency
provisions in your vehicle all year round, now is
a good time to check that they are still functional
or edible.
- Brush up on your winter
driving skills. Don't be fooled by all those
autumn decorations. Thanksgiving can bring some of
the worst winter driving conditions of the year. Snow,
sleet and ice are particular worries, so now is the
time to check those tires and recall what it means
to "steer
into the skid."
- Stretch and move whenever you get
the chance. If you find yourself trapped on a
jammed highway with a few thousand of your closest
strangers, do some road-trip calisthenics. Isometric
exercises like rolling your shoulders and flexing
your back and upper arms can be great stress relievers.
If possible, get out of your car and perform the "Chicken
Dance." You will entertain your fellow travelers
and get your own circulation moving. It may not get
the traffic to move any faster, but it will put some
of the festivity back into the trip.
- Take along audio
books and some games. Audio books are great
because you can listen to them while you drive, but
bring along some other amusements in case your route
becomes a parking lot. A deck of cards is the easiest
and most portable entertainment, but travel versions
of popular board games can also be good choices.
- Remember: Any road trip is a good
road trip! It's the unplanned events that can
transform an ordinary car trip into an adventure.
A few years ago, Megan and I were trapped in an ice
storm in north Texas somewhere east of Amarillo on
Christmas Eve. It was a dark, frigid night, and it
was a little bit scary, but our CB radio made it possible
to chat with "Moonrider," the driver of
the 18-wheeler stuck in front of me. Seven years later,
we're still friends, and we would never have met him
if it weren't for that paralyzing storm.
This isn't to say that I hope you get stuck
in an ice storm this holiday season. But if you do find
yourself dining on Spam and fruit cocktail instead of
turkey and cranberries, it isn't a tragedy; it's an
adventure. After all, life's a journey. Be thankful
when you find yourself on a scenic route.
Happy
Holiday Roadtripping,
Mark & Megan
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